'Ow 'Bout a Title Shot, Hank?

(The last match out of the way, the camera turns to a wide-angle shot of Joshua Brahn and Mark Lancer sitting ringside, the fans cheering in the background.)

Joshua Brahn: Fans, we're going to take you live now backstage, where Kurt Larson is standing by, with tonight's Overdrive Title challenger, 'The Highway Cowboy' Hank Gently.

(Cut to shot backstage, shown live on the 'Tron too, of Larson standing, microphone in hand, with a nervous-looking Hank - alongside solid-as-a-rock Eddy, his gigantic pet Hereford bull. The fans in the arena fill the air with cheers.)

Kurt Larson: Thanks Josh - Hank Gently, tonight, you get your first-ever championship title match here in High Octane Wrestling - my first question, Hank, would be: are you ready?

Hank: (chuckles nervously) Heh - ya know, Kurt... Ah'd like tah tell ya'll Ah was born ready fer this. That'd sounds 'bout right. An' sure as all heck, Ah been trainin' harder 'an some green hand headed off tah his firs' rodeo... (pauses to look round at Eddy.)

Hank: But Ah'd be lyin' to ya. Ol' Hank's got a belly full o' butterflies, Ah feel like Ah'm this close tah loosin' mah lunch right now! This ain't jus' Ol' Hank's first title shot here in the Haitch Oh Dubya, no sir - this is mah first-ever shot at gold in any rasslin' organization Ah ever worked fer. Imagine that - Ol' Hank, just a short while back, fightin' fer mah very professional life. An' now, since Ah carried on that there roll, here Ah am, gettin' my chance at exactly what Ah was lookin' fer. So yeah, tah answer the question, Ah'm ready for mah shot, Ah'm as ready as Ah'll ever be - Ah'm jus' workin' on gittin' mah pre-fight jitters outta mah system, so Ah'm ready tonight, Ain't that right, Eddy! (The crowd chants 'Eddy! Eddy! Eddy!')

Hank: An' 'fore Ah gits too much farther along here, Ah gotta give thanks - Ah gotta give mah thanks, to Miss Chase - thank ya, Ma'am, fer this opportunity - Ah am truly a grateful man. Thank ya.

Kurt: Your opponent tonight, Hank, current Overdrive champion - Jaques LaCroix, The Frenchise. The two of you match up very well, you're both versatile grapplers, but there's no doubt he holds an experience advantage over you. Thoughts?

Hank: Jacks La-Krox... The Frenchie - yeah, Ah've watched him in the ring, me an' Eddy both, we been watchin'. Even back 'fore we knew 'bout this match, we had our eyes on Jacks. So we already know a few things about him... Sure, he's tough - but heck, we're all rasslers, we're all tough. Sure, he's got himself some skills - but heck agin, that ain't nothin' special neither. Experience? More experience? Son, once you been in an' outta this ring a few thousand times, there ain't not much diffence 'tween three-thousan' an' fiv-thousan' more. Most importan' difference 'tween mahself, an' Mistah La-Krox, is this - he's alrady holdin' that strap. He's done quenched his thirst, he's filled that empty spot in his belly, screamin' out, (Hank literally throws his head back, and screams at the top of his lungs in a piercing shriek) 'I WAN' IT!! IWANITSOBAD!!! LEMME HAVE IT!!! NOWWWWW!!!!!' (Kurt backs away, holding his ears, cowering with a scowl on his face, as Hank regains composure. Eddy appears uneffected.)

Hank: Well Kurt, Ah still got me an empty belly... 'side from them butterflies, that is... Tonight, Ol' Hank's gonna get his fill - because tonight, Jacks, Ah'm the hungry man. C'mon, Eddy!

(Hank turns briskly from Kurt, but is obviously held up by the lumbering speed of his sidekick. Hank tugs on the rope he's holding, attached to Eddy's golden cow bell, and eventually the bull decides to cooperate, and starts to walk along at a faster pace.)

Kurt: Josh, Mark - back to you guys!

(Back to the wide-angle, ringside shot of Lancer and Brahn, with fans waving, 'wooing' and whistling along behind them.)

Mark Lancer: Thanks Kurt, great job - wow - Josh, is it just me, or does his Happy Meal lose a couple extra fries as the weeks go by?

Josh: He's intense, Mark, Hank is an intense, passionate individual. Let's leave it at that, and wish him luck tonight.

Mark: Wish him luck?! C'mon, Josh, you cannot want to see that man with a championship belt in this company, surely! He talks to his pet bull! Strike that, he HAS a PET BULL!!

Josh: I don't know about that, regardless, Hank Gently is a man of honour, and integrity, and I would have no problem at all with him representing this company in any fashion. Onto the next match...

Mark: What's wrong with you?

Inserted into 4/17/12 Overdrive