Hank & Eddy on Overdrive (Week Two)

(The restless crown chatter in the darkness, when suddenly, the twangy-guitar licks of 'Highwayman' fade in. A spotlight shines brightly towards the curtains on the main stage, and as a highlight-reel video rolls on the 'Tron and firework sparks fly in all directions, "The Highway Cowboy" Hank Gently and his massive Hereford bull Eddy wander out to the cheers of the fans. Hank and Eddy pause, enjoy the reaction for a few moments, and then slowly make their way down the aisle, Hank high-fiving fans as he goes. Eddy is obviously growing more used to the crowds, barely seeming to notice children leaning over the rails to pet him anymore. As they approach the near turnbuckle, Hank ties Eddy off by the long rope he leads him around with, and takes the long way into the ring past the Timekeeper's table, picking up a microphone on his way, up the ring steps and into the squared-circle...)

Hank Gently: Well, Howdy, Ya'll!! (Crowd cheers.)

Hank Gently: Wellsir, Ah don't wanna lie tah ya'll... las' night didn't quite go as Ah'd planned! Ah'd really wan'ed tah kick mah Haitch Oh Dubya career off with a big ol' Bang, 's'pecially af'er last week with Jin' an' all. (Crowd cheers again.)

Hank Gently: But, 'stead, Ah didn' quite git the job done 'gainst Freak Show... that Kid showed me up last night - an' Ah wanna 'nother run at 'im!! (Crowd cheers, while Hank grins, and looks left and right, nodding and winking towards the fans... suddenly, as if distracted by something, he stops, and with wide eyes, looks towards Eddy the Bull at ringside... Hank slowly brings the microphone back to his lips.)

Hank Gently: Nah, Eddy, Ho-ho! No, no, no, nah, never, Eddy, t'ain't like that! Ah t'ain't in'rested in tryin' tah git mah own back by pinnin' that Freak. He beat me, put mah shoulders tah that mat, one, two, three... Ah can't turn back the clock, Eddy, no, Ah can't... turn back time. But, Ah kin affect the future! Yessir, Ah can! Ah kin take the future in mah own hands, an' Ah kin cry out, (Hank throws his head back, and screams into the microphone) Freak Show!! Freak Show!!!

Hank Gently: (Hank regains composure) You hearin' me now, Kid? Have Ah got yer attention now, Son? Ya know, sure, you may have put mah shoulders down last night. Sure, sure, you got yer win over Ol' Hank, you got that, that's in your pocket now, Freak. But when it comes down tah who dished out more pain... who gave more punishment... well Freak, Ah don't see you comin' out here t'nite! Yer sittin' at home, lickin' yer wounds. Well, Ah'm like a wolf, Kid... ain't nobody ever gonna see mah wounds. But Ah'm real good at dishin' out wounds... Real good, ain't that right, Eddy? (The crowd cheers loudly.)

Hank Gently: Freak Show, Ah challenge you - next week - tah try an' make me (Hanks tilts his head and screams again) BLEEEEEEEEEED!!!!

(Hank stands in a frenzied, fast-breathing, yet almost-petrified pose as the crowd roars their approval. Slowly, he lowers the microphone from his near-foaming mouth, drops it, and makes his way over to Eddy outside the ring, who he unties, and leads slowly back up the ramp and out through the curtains. The spotlight goes off, and the crowd goes back to chattering amongst themselves in anticipation of the next segment...)

Inserted into 2/28/2012 Overdrive! Since next week's matches are already pretty much set, the boss might have to get involved in this one and set it for a certain final event of the season.